Of Saboteurs and Energon Cookies
by SeekerLuna
Summary: This is why you should never take energon cookies away from two very pregnant saboteur femmes. Bad things happen. Just ask Ratchet. Randomness ensues! Minor language, tie-in with War Within a Spark. I might continue it if people ask me to


**The result of me being unable to sleep and drinking a monster at 4 am. **

**This is in the same universe as War Within a Spark, it happens at some point when both Luna and StormStrike are still pregnant. I totally recommend going to read aforementioned story as well :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers, it belongs to HasTak. I claim only Luna, her trine, a butt load of other characters I can't be bothered to name at this ungodly hour and the sparklings. StormStrike belongs to Mercedes Wolfcry.**

**Remember to review~ Now time for me to go pass out I guess.**

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"No, that's enough!" Ratchet grabbed the jar of energon cookies from the two pregnant femmes, earning a chorus of groans and curses.

"Ratchet!" Luna whined at him, attempting to win him over with her puppy eyes. "Come on, we haven't had any all day!"

"Yeah!" StormStrike agreed, still eyeing the jar. "It's not like it's doing us any harm."

"These energon cookies aren't healthy for you or the sparklings," He snapped at them. "If you two don't stop overindulging on them, I'm going to start limiting how many you can have a day."

"What!" They gaped at him, horrified by the thought of having their sweet, delicious cookies taken away from them.

"You heard me," He grunted. "You each can have three more and that's it." He fished out six of the glowing cookies and handed three to each of them. The femmes gave him sour looks as he walked off, jar in hand.

"This bites," Luna grumbled, nibbling on a cookie.

"I agree," Strike mumbled. "He has no right to deny us what we want! Human femmes always get to eat whatever they want during their pregnancies, or so I've heard."

"Yeah but they usually…" Luna trailed off and her optics flashed. "Get their mates to retrieve the desired item for them~"

"I like the way you think," Strike grinned when she caught on. The two femmes grinned and ate the last of their cookies before they got up and went to find their respective lovers.

"Starscream?" Luna called out in a timid, scared voice. The mech immediately rushed to her side, worried, ready to defend her and fight whoever may have hurt her.

"What is it?" He checked her over for injury.

"Ratchet is being mean," She sniffled. "He took away our energon cookies."

Starscream gave her an incredulous look and shook his helm.

"That's why you're upset?" He rumbled, rubbing her stomach plating affectionately.

"Yes," She mumbled. "Can you get me some more? Please?" She looked up at him with wide, purple optics. Starscream rolled his own optics and scowled at his lover.

"Luna, Ratchet is your physician, he knows best," He chuckled when she pouted.

"Maybe I should go bother the twins. I'm sure _they _would get me what I want," She gave him a look. Starscream growled and pulled her close.

"Don't even think about it," He growled. "I'll see what I can do but I make no promises." This immediately brightened Luna's mood as she smiled and giggled happily. She kissed him with a purr and darted into their shared quarters with a 'thank you' thrown over her shoulder as she rushed past. "I will never understand femmes or their cravings for such junk food."

Meanwhile, StormStrike was attempting to badger the twins into getting back her precious cookies.

"If you love me, you'll get me more energon cookies," She cooed at them. The twins looked at each other and then back at their persuasive lover. "If you do as I ask like good little mechs, I'll be sure to reward you~" She purred seductively into their audials. The twins groaned and groped her, growling when she abruptly pulled away.

"We'll get them from Hatchet," Sideswipe rumbled.

"We've gotten high-grade from him without him noticing so this should be easy," Sunstreaker growled.

"Good." Strike's optics glowed with joy as she kissed her mech's and sent them on their way.

-X-X-X-

The twins were shocked to find Starscream sneaking through the base, heading for the med bay, just as they were.

"Let me guess, StormStrike wants energon cookies?" Starscream folded his arms over his chest.

"Yes," They responded together.

"Distraction?" Sideswipe grinned at the Seeker.

"I'll get the cookies," Sunstreaker grinned ghoulishly.

"Let's make this quick," Starscream rumbled. The three walked in and were prepared to fend off a barrage of flying wrenches – only it never came.

"Huh, guess doc bot isn't here," Sideswipe grinned. "Let's get to work." The three mechs began to search the small med bay, looking for the confiscated jar of energon cookies.

"Found them!" Starscream hissed to the other two when he finally found it. He quickly removed the jar and turned to join the others who were waiting by the door.

"That was too easy!" Sideswipe laughed as he took an energon cookie for himself.

The three mech's were taken by surprise when three wrenches struck them each and the jar was snatched from the Seeker.

"Nice try," Ratchet snorted. "They aren't getting these back so go back to your mates already." The three mech's grumbled and scurried off back to their quarters. Ratchet sighed and shook his helm before moving to find a better hiding place for the cookies.

Primus only knew how long it would be before the femmes tried to strike again.

-X-X-X-

"Ah, no." Luna yelped and jerked her servo back, scowling at Ratchet who was smirking, obviously enjoying the power he had over her consumption of cookies. "That's it for you."

"Frag you," She grumbled irritably. This earned her a swat to the back of the helm. With a growl, she got up and stalked off, followed by an equally annoyed StormStrike.

"We have to do something," StormStrike muttered. "This is worse than the Pit!" Well, that wasn't true but to a pregnant femme, it probably was.

"We're both saboteur's, we should be able to swipe those cookies no problem," Luna muttered. Strike gave her a look and then a slow grin worked its way across her faceplates. "What? What did I say?"

"We're both saboteurs~" She grinned wickedly. "I say its time we dusted off our joints and got to work~"

"I love the way you think~" Luna grinned with her. The two femmes hurried off to StormStrike's off base home to talk.

"That can't be good," Sunstreaker muttered as he watched them leave.

"Should we warn Ratchet?" Starscream asked, though the sarcasm behind his words was clearly evident. The three looked between each other and burst into laughter.

"Pit no! Let the mech suffer whatever wrath he has brought upon himself!" Sideswipe cackled, clutching his sides as he continued laughing.

Bumblebee and Bulkhead watched them, confused, wondering what they were laughing about.

"Don't over think it," Arcee walked up then. "It's something only a mech with a sparked mate would understand… and a femme." She smiled knowingly. She knew the two other femmes were going to exact revenge on Ratchet and she was going to be damned if she wasn't around to witness it… or at least record it.

It was bound to be entertaining.

-X-X-X-

Ratchet was becoming paranoid.

The femmes hadn't tried to steal any extra cookies in quite some time and they were acting tame… which immediately set off alarms in his processor. And they were spending quite a bit of time off base.

So when he found himself alone at the base, he found himself jumpier than usual.

"Whose there?" He demanded when he heard an echoing 'clang'. He scanned the area and found nothing out of the ordinary. He hesitantly returned to his work, only to stop a few kliks later when it happened again, this time much closer. "Come out!" He looked around wildly before deciding it would be beneficial to just go and investigate. He cautiously moved through the halls of the silo, pausing whenever he heard a sound. He could have sworn he heard femme laughter once or twice! "This isn't funny. Stop your foolish game this instant."

Ratchet could have sworn he heard the sound of an energon blade being drawn.

_:Optimus, now might be a good time for you to return. I have reason to believe the base has been infiltrated.: _Ratchet sent out the message as he hurried back towards the control room, scanning his surroundings all the while.

He barely heard or saw two figures drop down behind him before it was too late and the world around him went black.

-X-X-X-

Optimus and the others hurried back the base as quickly as they possibly could and immediately started searching for whatever threat Ratchet had warned them about. What they found however, had them trembling with suppressed laughter.

Ratchet lay hog-tied on the floor with a gag stuffed into his mouth to keep him quiet while the two femmes feasted on their spoils. Their fingers and mouths were covered in crumbs and gooey bits of energon as they happily munched on their cookies.

"And that, Ratchet, is why you should never take energon cookies from a pregnant femme," Arcee smirked. The medic cursed at her and the other femmes as best he could around his gag and demanded to be released.

"We'll let you go, as soon as we're done anyway," StormStrike snickered. This had Ratchet basically throwing a hissy fit.

"How did you two get the drop on doc bot anyway?" Miko asked once she recovered from her fit of laughter. "You two are like, huge!"

"Good question," Sunstreaker looked to his lover. "How _did _you two get the drop on him?"

"With how pregnant you are it shouldn't have been possible! Not even Jazz can pull something like that." Sideswipe commented before he could really stop himself. The two femmes paused in their consumption of goodies and stared at the red mech. "What? What did I say?" He looked around at the others, confused.

"You never, ever, call a lady fat," June scolded him.

"But I didn't," He frowned.

"Indirectly, yes you did," Optimus told him. Sideswipe thought back on his words and groaned, cursing himself.

StormStrike and Luna looked at each other and continued to eat.

_:He's next, Strike.:_

_:All three of them are, my dear Luna. Their time will come, just wait.: _

Their lovers would pay the price but for now, they wanted only to enjoy their spoils while basking in their victory over Ratchet the Hatchet.

All was right at the Autobot base now that the pregnant femmes were once again in possession of their cookies. So a word of advice, never take energon cookies from pregnant femmes, especially pregnant femmes who happen to be saboteurs.

You will be hog-tied and gagged.

Ratchet learned his lesson and so too will the others…


End file.
